I switched the template and gave my site a redesign. Ok, basically its still laid out the same but it looks different. We just got back from a mini-vacation and I'm ready for another one. I'm not dreading coming to work, but I'm starting to contemplate whether this is the best way to spend my time by sitting at a desk trying to figure what the hell I'm doing here.

I keep having flashes of this scene from the movie Chasing Amy and how one of the characters gets into this huge argument about his station in life. I never had a clear vision of my station in life, and well, if you don't stand up make your own choices, someone in life makes that choice for you. I guess I'm learning that the hard way. My parents always extolled the virtues of having a solid/safe job to fall back on. But what do you do when you are sick of the fallback job? I have to preface that I am not vomiting up bile because I have to come to work everyday and get paid a nice salary to do a pretty dull and yet not too complex job. No, that would be a spoiled thing to say, but I guess I'm saying after working 8+ years in a job that I never really intended to keep in the first place, I have to ask myself, what the hell am I doing? I keep telling myself that I need to re-evaluate things, but really, its difficult to be creative when you've been told what to do all your life. This is my current and ongoing personal obstacle among many others that I'm not sure how to deal with.